Monday, May 31, 2010
Carnac the Guru: Never Second Guess Guru's Gut
By Hockey Guru
Why? Why go back on Chicago? The men-against-boys argument sounded good. The experience in the Philly lineup seemed good. The Flyers depth looked good.
(I blame my bookie, who wouldn't take my last-minute bet I tried phoning in from the airport).
But Chicago is really good. They may be young, but they're just really, really good. They do whatever they need to to win. Throughout Game One it seemed that if they needed a goal, they simply went out and got it.
Brian Boucher looked like an injured goalie. The Game Winning Goal was scored when he failed to extend his leg out when down in the butterfly - a move that simply seemed too painful to execute. If the Flyers need him again, they're toast.
Michael Leighton was a Chicago Blackhawk draft pick and player. It would seem that not only does the organization know him very well, but likely many of the players were in camps and on teams with him. (Okay lazy research, but the Guru gave the Research Department a day off today, for the holiday).
Fortunately for us fans, both teams believe that trading scoring chances will work to their favor. De-fense is merely de wall in the backyard that keeps the dog in. Expect another high scoring game tonight and another Chicago win. And tonight, Chicago gets a few Power Plays, especially towards the end of a relatively lopsided and chippy game.
Final Score: Chicago 7 - Philadelphia 3
What we learned about, today:
Blackhawks,
Brian Boucher,
Carnac the Guru,
Flyers,
Hockey,
Hockey Guru,
Michael Leighton,
Mike Myers,
Predictions
Friday, May 28, 2010
Vidi Vici: An Official STP Friday Night Pep Rally
By Hockey Guru
Looking for some on-line entertainment?
Well STP has got some You Tube Goodness to get you fired up - or Flyered up - for the Stanley Cup Finals.
First, let's take a look at the underdog Philadelphia Flyers and their journey to the Stanley Cup Finals:
On their journey, Shawn the Dancing Flyer Fan grew out his playoff beard and performed moves as special as those performed on the ice by Mike Richards and Danny Briere.
In keeping with this year's playoff theme what if...
On a serious note - let's take a look back at the Flyers Road to the Cup:
Now, it's time to introduce the 2009-2010 Chicago Blackhawks
These Hawks are looking to recapture some of the glory of the past and bring Lord Stanley's Cup back to Chitown for the first time in forty years. Here's a look back at some of the history of the Chicago Blackhawks:
Philadelphia is also looking to recapture a little of the magic from their glory days. Rather than include the entire HBO Special on the Broad Street Bullies - hopefully this clip will suffice:
If you're interested in the words to Here Come the Hawks, or just want to hear that version again:
Or, for a humorous version, in 2008, the Blackhawk players attempted to sing the song themselves, with many of the players involved in this Stanley Cup Final - perhaps you might find this next clip entertaining
Should that have entertained you, this surely will bring some amusement:
It seems that Chicago is not only known for its jazz - but for its musical connections to its sports teams. Everyone has to remember this classic:
So of course, the updating of "Here Come the Hawks" through rap had to be put together:
Last year in the play-offs, the fantastic re-make of Vanilla Ice wasn't enough to inspire the Hawks through to the finals:
So perhaps, this year's playoff song will be a bit more magical:
Regardless of those songs, we surely will be hearing this next one - typically accompanied with crowds cheering following Blackhawk goals and wins:
Had enough of the musical tribute to Chicago - itching for some hockey action - well here's a tribute on the Hawks 2009-2010 season
Excited for the start of this series yet? With both buildings there'll be historic, inspirational and moving renditions of the American National Anthem and God Bless America. Here's a taste of what those will be like:
Finally, here's the latest "History Will be Made"
Let's drop the puck!
What we learned about, today:
Bears,
Blackhawks,
Daniel Briere,
Flyers,
Hockey,
Hockey Guru,
Mike Richards,
Vidi Vici
Carnac the Guru: Talk About Predictable Outcomes
By Hockey Guru
Maybe the forecast of a Philadelphia and Chicago Stanley Cup Final was predictable as far back as last September, but the paths the two teams took to arrive here certainly were enjoyable and anything but predictable. [Editor's Note: I disagree on that last point, since I actually did predict almost the exact road - that the Blackhawks would come out of the 2nd seed, and that the Flyers would come out of the 8th seed]
The latest Cardiac Kids - these Philadelphia Flyers - may be the poster child for the latest wave of 0-3 series comebacks, but Chicago seems to be a well-oiled machine, destined to hoist the Cup in the next two weeks. What does the Guru's crystal ball foresee?
The data going in shows that the Hawks defeated Nashville, Vancouver and San Jose en route to their SCF appearance. Meanwhile the Flyers eliminated New Jersey, Boston and Montreal to arrive on the grand stage.
According to the Crystal Ball - San Jose and Vancouver would come out on top of each of the teams eliminated by Philadelphia - going a combined 6-0 in those matchups (the closest being New Jersey-Vancouver which would have gone 7 games).
This matchup, at first glance would appear to be a BCS school vs non-BCS school in a National Championship game. Sure, it would be a great story for Boise State to knock of Alabama - but realisticly - it's just not going to happen.
However, on the ice, one thing that can not be overlooked is the parity in the NHL. The fact that the Flyers only made it to the playoffs following a shoot-out victory is proof enough. The Flyers are mentally tough - as coming back from an 0-3 hole proves - and they have a deep and talented team.
The Hawks had their hands full with Nashville. 6'5" Goaltender Pekka Rinne and the great-skating defense of Nashville caused a lot of concern and with a couple bounces - the Hawks were nearly bounced from the play-offs. (Well by nearly, they weren't even pushed to an elimination game).
The Hawks were built and designed to overcome the Detroit Red Wings machine - one which "invented" the left-wing lock which is employed by Philadelphia. The Hawks will be soaring and will break through against Philadelphia much the way they did against San Jose and Vancouver. They will be able to raise their game when needed to win.
The series prediction from the Guru is the Hawks in 5 games.
Game One prediction: Fast, physical first period. Hawks scoring at least one PP goal and leading 2-0 or 2-1 after the first. Game settling down a bit in the second, but another Hawks "victory" in the second period with the Hawks wrapping up Game One with a decisive 6-3 victory.
[Update: It's currently 7:19 PM ET on Saturday, May 29th, or about an hour before puck drop for Game One.]
The 2010 Stanley Cup Playoffs has been unpredictable - although the Hockey Guru has been right much more often than not - the Hockey Guru, himself has proven to be unpredictable.
Tonight marks the first 180-degree turn around on a prediction - prior to anything else changing.
The Guru contemplated the prediction of the Hawks in five - and one thing kept coming back to him - this is a series of men against boys.
Jonathan Toews and Patrick Kane are boys. They say the right things - but they really don't believe that this may be their only chance at a Stanley Cup. The Flyers have more veterans - more career players that will be leaving everything they have on the ice. The Flyers have a great coach and this series will be much more difficult than the original Hawks in Five prediction.
The depth of the Flyers is probably more impressive than the depth of the Hawks (particularly if going on merit and not reputation). Marian Hossa hasn't produced yet - what would make the crystal ball predict otherwise? The Flyers will get the jump on the series tonight and might even get up 2-0. Chicago will not be swept (although there are some experts that have consulted with the Guru with just that predictiion)!
The Guru is not quite prepared to change the series pick from Chicago - just he believes that Chicago will have to step up their game in this series and have little to no margin for error.
The way this first game unfolds may be as telling as game one in the Eastern Conference Finals or may leave the Guru continuing to be on the fence.
Tonight's revised Game One prediction: Philadelphia 4 - Chicago 3
What we learned about, today:
Blackhawks,
Carnac the Guru,
Flyers,
Hockey,
Hockey Guru,
Jonathan Toews,
Marian Hossa,
Patrick Kane,
Predictions
Thursday, May 27, 2010
The Sports Talk Playoff Pool: The NHL Final Exam
By Hockey Guru
The clock is ticking down to the drop of the puck in Game 1.
Time to cram for/in one Final Exam, to be graded over the course of the series to determine the final fantasy hockey championship of the 2009-2010 season. (Don't forget the 2010 NHL Player Entry Draft Fantasy Draft will be upon us shortly).
Will the Shithawks ride the Blackhawks to as much success in the Finals Exam, as he did in the current Sports Talk Playoff Pool or even the STP fantasy league? Will there be more or less entries for this Exam pool than the usual suspects?
Prepare for the Exam and submit your entries via e-mail at cbsbaseball2002@yahoo.com
Final prizes will be determined based on total entries and dependent on how much sponsorship is pledged. It is expected that these will be the best prizes to date.
So to enhance your personal enjoyment of the 2010 Stanley Cup Final, put yourself into the action and build the Cup-winning roster that amasses the highest point total, by answering these 20 questions:
Considering the following scoring breakdown:
SHO = 3 Pts
SV = .1 Pts
GA = -1 Pt
Goal = 1 Pt
Assist = 1 Pt
SHP = 1 Pt
GWG = 1 Pt
OT Point Scored = 1 Pt
Please select one player per question:
- 1) Antii Niemi or Michael Leighton
- 2) Chris Pronger, Kimmo Timonen, Duncan Keith, Brent Seabrook
- 3) Matt Carle, Braydon Coburn, Brian Campbell, Brent Sopel
- 4) Mike Richards, Jeff Carter, Patrick Kane, Jonathan Toews
- 5) Danny Briere, Simon Gagne, Claude Giroux, Dustin Byfuglien, Patrick Sharp, Marian Hossa
- 6) Ville Leino, Scott Hartnell, Aaron Asham, James van Riemsdyk, Ian Laperriere, Kris Versteeg, Dave Bolland, Troy Brower, John Madden, Ben Eager
- 7) Will there be an overtime game in Chicago? (10 Pts)
- 8) Will there be an overtime game in Philadelphia? (10 Pts)
- 9) How many games does the series last? (10 Pts for exact answer only)
- 10) How many total goals will be scored in the series? (10 Pts for the closest answer)
- 11) Will there be any fighting majors? (10 Pts)
- 12) How many empty-net goals will be scored in the series? Over or under 2.5? (10 Pts)
- 13) Will the team that wins Game 1 go on to win the series? (10 Pts)
- 14) How many 5-on-3 goals will be scored in the series? Over or under 1.5? (10 Pts)
- 15) Will Philadelphia be shutout in any of the games? (10 Pts)
- 16) Will Chicago be shutout in any of the games? (10 Pts)
- 17) Will any player from questions 1-4 end up missing a game in the series? (10 Pts)
- 18) Which player not mentioned on this exam will score the most Goals + Assists? (20 Pts for exact answer only)
- 19) If Philadelphia wins the series, who does Mike Richards hand the Cup to first? If Chicago wins, who does Jonathan Toews hand the Cup to first? (20 Pts)
- 20) Who will win the Conn Smythe Trophy? (25 Pts)
What we learned about, today:
Blackhawks,
Flyers,
Hockey,
Hockey Guru,
Jonathan Toews,
Mike Richards,
Sports Pools
Monday, May 24, 2010
Carnac the Guru: I'll Make This Short and Sweet
By Hockey Guru
Eastern Conference Finals, Game 5:
Having revised his prediction for this series to the Flyers in 5, the Guru sees no reason to deviate now. Everything that has taken place to this point indicates that Montreal's defense will not be able to shut down the Flyers.
There will be a desperation in Philadelphia tonight, but surprisingly, much of it will be sweating out of (and wicking away from, thanks to RBK) the orange uniforms.
Montreal, having lived through two previous comebacks and going 5-0 in elimination games, will create a fear for the Flyers that losing tonight would be like losing the series.
With that desperation, the Flyers will win a close game, by a 2-1 score.
Both of the Conference Finals series this year will prove to be short (and sweet for fans of the 'Hawks and Flyers).
Let the Stanley Cup Finals begin!
What we learned about, today:
Blackhawks,
Canadiens,
Carnac the Guru,
Flyers,
Hockey,
Hockey Guru,
Predictions
Sunday, May 23, 2010
Carnac the Guru: SharkWeek's Sunday Bloody Sunday
By Hockey Guru
I can't believe the news today. I can't close my eyes and make it go away. How long must we sing this song?
[For those who might prefer a different version to listen to, while reading:]
It's hard to believe the Western Conference Finals could be over today. Certainly the San Jose Sharks and their fans must really be living the opening lines to this song. It's unbelievable that the same old song for San Jose - as sung by the fat lady - is here once more. Their season is coming up short of the Stanley Cup Finals .... again.
San Jose has not played poorly. Maybe an argument could be made that Evgeni Nabokov played poorly in Games 1 & 2, but the end result in the latter would not have been any different either way. San Jose could have won Game 1 - and obviously, an OT game could go either way.
But watching these games, it just seems that Chicago has not been forced to put the pedal to the metal; that they have not really been pushed. Antti Niemi is looking more and more like a Stanley Cup winning goaltender, answering all the questions about goaltending being the weakness on Chicago's team.
Short of a series of Blackhawk injuries, the Magic 8-ball just does not foresee a good outlook for San Jose. While that may not be much of a fearless forecast, what do you want from me? This series is already over.
But San Jose isn't playing for the series today. They are playing for pride. They are sick and tired of the criticism, the questions about their heart and their toughness, based on past playoff failures. They will put desperation to a new level in Game 4 that may well end up in a parade to the penalty box if this game starts to get away from them. The Joe Thornton slash on Dave Bolland in Game 2 may end up looking like a love tap when all is said and done. What seems to follow desperation - once things start going the wrong way - is invariably, frustration. The frustration was there in Game 3. Even in a tie game, it seemed that Sharks players were looking to point fingers. The Guru seems to have noticed a chemistry issue brewing in San Jose.
This Chicago team is expected to play a similar game to their Game 3 effort, which included patience, allowing San Jose to slow the pace while they wait for their own opportunities. Those opportunities will come and Chicago will take advantage. If San Jose can remain focused and disciplined, this game will stay close and could even reach overtime again. Perhaps even allow us an opportunity to see a little more hockey in this series.
However, there is blood in the water, and when a Shark smells blood, it attacks and goes into a frenzy. Unfortunately, it is the Sharks themselves that are bleeding and their frenzy will lead to a lack of discipline. By the end of the 2nd period, frustration will take over and Chicago will put up a couple of power play goals and carry at least a 3-goal lead into the final 5 minutes.
Final score Chicago 6 - San Jose 2.
It will be another Madhouse on Madison as the Hawks punch their ticket to the Stanley Cup Finals.
What we learned about, today:
Antti Niemi,
Blackhawks,
Carnac the Guru,
Hockey,
Hockey Guru,
Predictions,
Sharks
Saturday, May 22, 2010
Carnac the Guru: A Big Thumbs Up & An Attaboy
By Hockey Guru
The Guru not only correctly predicted Chicago in Game 3, but by calling for the overtime, he earned a bonus from his editor. Not a financial bonus, mind you, but a hearty "Thumbs Up" and handwritten congratulatory note are just as good, sometimes. Aren't they?
Missing the correct final score (but still hitting the under) and the bold double-overtime prediction that fell short, must have been what cost the Guru the real cash bonus.
Anyhow, first some observations on last night's game (with double the YouTube Saturday linky goodness). The speed of Game 3 seemed to be much slower than it was in Games 1 & 2. The officiating got involved early and often, creating a hesitancy to the game and preventing a real flow from developing with the powerplays. The initial goaltender interference call on David Bolland just 1:16 into the game was called under a much different standard, as later Joe Pavelski (it was Joe, wasn't it?) essentially kicked Niemi and wasn't called. Additionally, the call on Hossa to create the 5-on-3 for San Jose was weak. If everything was called that tightly, there'd be almost continuous whistles and the game would be played at 4-on-4.
The pace of the game definitely favoured San Jose, who definitely played well. As mentioned in the post yesterday, a bounce, a break, a fluke and things could have been completely different. If Pavelski had managed to get his stick on the puck, and the first "no-goal" was allowed to count, everything would have been different. But the goal didn't count, and history was made - by Big Buff.
Chicago now has a 3-0 series lead and the Guru will have more to say about this series. But that will have to wait until tomorrow.
We have ourselves a series. The truth rings loudly. How quickly things can change! The Canadiens showed their colours on Thursday and continue to make history.
Also. What if 13 wasn't so lucky, and his crosscheck/interference on Matt Carle had been called, just prior to the goal?
Well the Guru doesn't think it would have mattered. Montreal was simply too much for the Flyers in Game 3 and now look to even up the series tonight - err - this afternoon.
A nastiness, an animosity has crept into this series. The Josh Georges crosscheck to Simon Gagne's face led to an apology from Georges?!?!? There's no apologizing in hockey!
Today is a game as anticipated in these playoffs as any before it. The Guru expects a Game 7-like intensity. The Flyers recognize that this is their opportunity to "win" the series and Montreal fans will make sure the team knows the critical importance of getting even in this series today.
In the end, the Flyers will prevail in this game 3-2 and keep the Guru's "revised" prediction of a five-game series alive.
What we learned about, today:
Blackhawks,
Canadiens,
Carnac the Guru,
Flyers,
Hockey,
Hockey Guru,
Josh Gorges,
Matt Carle,
Predictions,
Sharks,
Simon Gagne
Friday, May 21, 2010
Carnac the Guru: It's Hard Out Here for a Psychic
By Hockey Guru
When things aren't going right, many choose to simply disappear. Not the Hockey Guru.
And apparently not the Montreal Canadiens. After two consescutive shutout losses, the Canadiens showed up last night at the Bell Centre and not only showed that they won't be going away easily - they once again gave the Guru a face full of egg!
Well, being wrong in the playoffs has not kept the Guru from showing up and bringing forth his keen insight and analysis.
While the research is excruciating, the deadlines never ending, an editor that is never happy and always breathing down his neck - the Hockey Guru is dedicated to his ever-growing (and incresingly female) fan base, for whom he is wiping the egg off and offering once again to share the fruits of his enormous crystal balls.
For tonight's Game 3, the Guru is putting on the only suit in the world that Don Cherry wouldn't wear and is stepping out to pimp out his predictions for Game 3 in the Hawks / Sharks series.
Quoting Westfield State College Alum, Peter Laviolette, ".... in the playoffs, it's never about momentum, it's always about desperation .... desperate teams are tough teams". Montreal certainly proved that last night and tonight the San Jose Sharks find themselves in the same 0-2 hole. San Jose is not only desperate - they are talented. A league high eight Olympians, including the "top line" from the Gold Medal-winning Team Canada, come into the United Center with an absolute purpose tonight.
Meanwhile, Joel Quenneville has taken steps to keep Chicago "desperate" - keeping the team toegether at a Chicago hotel, as if they were still on the road (where they've won 7 consecutive games).
The Guru postulates that what looked to be a comfortable position for Philly has certainly taken a sharp U-turn, and that the Montreal victory may have indirectly created a greater sense of "desparation" in Chicago, realizing that their "comfortable" position today can change very quickly with a loss tonight at home. You can bet that the more mature members of this young team are contemplating the same thing at the hotel bar.
The first goal of the game tonight will be especially huge. Both teams will come out playing a "road game" - that is, chipping the puck out, getting the puck deep, being very defensively responsible. The track meet up and down the ice will commence - but with limited scoring opportunities. These teams will be using their speed, size, strength and skills primarily for defense making goals rarer than reader comments on this site.
Having gone what seems like an eternity without an overtime game, the Guru is forecasting a lengthy OT tonight - double OT or longer is very possible. In a game this close, a bounce, a fluke, a penalty could be the difference. If that bounce comes early, it could snowball and once again smear egg on the Guru, but the fearless forecaster is going with .... [drumroll please] ....
Chicago 2 - San Jose 1 (2OT)
Now that's pimping quite the fearless forecast. Oh, and don't forget ....
What we learned about, today:
Blackhawks,
Canadiens,
Carnac the Guru,
Hockey,
Hockey Guru,
Predictions,
Sharks
Thursday, May 20, 2010
The Top Ten List: Films About The Sweet Science
By Chris Barrymore
Presented, as I am wont to do, in chronological order:
Kid Galahad (1962) Starring Elvis Presley, Charles Bronson – Although I have not yet seen this film, it was recommended by Will-He-M, and since I have no reason to doubt the integrity or honesty of the Shithawks, it’s in. This is a remake of the 1937 original, and stars Mississippi’s favorite son in perhaps the first (and last?) boxing film that also happens to be a musical. Here's a more interesting fact. For this role, Presley was tutored in the arts of pugilism by former world welterweight champ Mushy Callahan, who has got to possess the best name of all time.
Requiem for a Heavyweight (1962) Starring Anthony Quinn, Jackie Gleason, Mickey Rooney, Jack Dempsey, Rory Calhoun, Cassius Clay – This film is the big screen adaptation of Rod Serling’s original teleplay. Quinn stars as a once-promising but now washed-up boxer who faces the end of his career after he is savagely defeated by a much younger foe. Cassius Clay appears as himself, as Quinn's opponent in a match at the beginning of the movie.
The Champ (1979) Starring Jon Voight, Faye Dunaway, Ricky Schroder – The original 1931 version won Academy Awards for Best Actor and Best Story (as it was called at the time). This film however, even though it is one of the first boxing films I remember seeing, didn’t win
Raging Bull (1980) Starring Robert DeNiro, Cathy Moriarty, Joe Pesci – This film has truly achieved legendary status, and featured Martin Scorcese directing Robert DeNiro, as real life boxer, Jake LaMotta. To this day, the role represents DiNiro's only Best Actor Oscar win.
Rocky III (1982) Starring Sylvester Stallone, Talia Shire, Burt Young, Carl Weathers, Burgess Meredith, Mr. T, Hulk Hogan - I'd like to nominate the entire Rocky series (1976-2006), but will settle for what is probably my personal favorite. Little needs to be said about this film, or any in the series really, since everyone already knows all there is to know about it. I probably could have included at least Rocky IV (1985) and Rocky Balboa (2006) on this list, but decided to stick with just the one film.
When We Were Kings (1996) Starring Muhammad Ali, George Foreman, Don King, James Brown, B.B. King, Mobutu Sese Seko, Spike Lee, Norman Mailer, George Plimpton – This film is a documentary about the 1974 Rumble in the Jungle between Ali and Foreman. It contains lots of social and political overtones, since in 1974, much like today, there were many things going in the U.S. and around the world that were shaping the present and the future to come. It won the Academy Award for Best Documentary Feature, and at the presentation, both Ali and Foreman came up to join the filmmakers to make it clear they had long made peace, with Foreman even helping Ali up the stairs.
The Hurricane (1999) Starring Denzel Washington - This film tells the story of boxer Rubin “Hurricane” Carter, whose conviction for a triple-murder was set aside after he had spent almost 20 years in prison. The script was adapted from the books Lazarus and the Hurricane by Sam Chaiton and Terry Swinton, and The 16th Round, written by Carter himself.
Ali (2001) Starring Will Smith, Jamie Foxx, Jon Voight, Mario Van Peebles, Ron Silver, Mykelti Williamson, Jada Pinkett Smith - This film tells the story of Muhammad Ali from 1964-1974, and covers his capturing the heavyweight title from Sonny Liston, his conversion to Islam, his criticism if the Vietnam War, his banishment from boxing, his return against Joe Frazier, and his regaining of the title from Foreman in the Rumble in the Jungle. Nominated for numerous awards from assorted foundations and associations, but came up empty on its two Academy Awards categories (Best Actor - Will Smith, Best Supporting Actor - Jon Voight)
Million Dollar Baby (2004) Starring Clint Eastwood, Hilary Swank, Morgan Freeman – Not only starring, but also directed by, co-produced by, and even scored by Eastwood, this film takes its name from a 1941 film that starred Ronald Reagan. Eastwood and company won the Academy Awards for Best Picture, Best Director, Best Actress (Swank), and Best Supporting Actor (Freeman). Plus, Eastwood was also nominated for Best Actor. Many have argued that this is Eastwood’s masterpiece, though I would personally vote for Unforgiven (1992).
Cinderella Man (2005) Starring Russell Crowe, Renee Zellweger, Paul Giamatti - Although Crowe appears to be a total jackass in real life, his films tend to transcend his public persona and invite the viewer on various journeys through the history of man. In this film, he stars as Irish-American boxer, James J. Braddock. Set during the Great Depression, it is inspired by the true-life story of the heavyweight champ who overcame 10-1 odds to beat Max Baer. This is considered one of the greatest upsets in boxing history. Although not included in the movie, because it would be a bummer of an ending, Braddock would later lose the title to Joe Louis, a couple of years later.
What we learned about, today:
Boxing,
Chris Barrymore,
George Foreman,
Jack Dempsey,
Muhammad Ali,
The Top Ten List
Carnac the Guru: The Modern-Day Cinderella Men
By Hockey Guru
Outscored 9-0 in two games – down two games to zero – the “Cinderella story” Montreal Canadiens return home for Game 3.
“A team is never in trouble [in a series] until they lose a game on home ice.”
Assuming that cliché rings true, it is surely being tested in this series. Needing to win four of the next five games is no small task whatsoever for Montreal, and that fact has created a line-up to jump off the bandwagon.
As the Guru was one of the last ones on, he was one of the first ones off, as demonstrated by his change of prediction after Game 1.
If the series is to end in 5 games, Montreal would have to win one of them, and if they can win one, they can win four.
The Guru continues to shake his crystal ball, hoping for greater clarity. Will this actually become a sweep or will Montreal prevail in 6?
Tonight will prove one of those is not a possibility, and the Guru is standing by his predictions from Tuesday.
Or as they are fast becoming known, Guru's Two-4-Tuesday predictions. The near perfect predictions from Tuesday still have the hockey world all abuzz. The Guru's prognostications have led to increased traffic to the Sports Talk Pool blog, reaching record levels of readership in anticipation of the latest installment of Carnac the Guru, and nearly causing a crash to the server!
With the NHL schedule switching up to alternating nights for each Conference, the Guru must put all his eggs into one basket tonight - or more fittingly, all his pucks into one net. And it is extremely difficult to put a single puck into the net - just ask the Montreal Canadiens. After being shut-out so far in the series, the Canadiens are on a mission to find some answers to Michael Leighton and the Flyers' defence.
Rather than employ the same coaching strategies as Claude Julien from last year's playoffs - calling out players and giving them the day off - Jacques Martin spent considerable time constructing and explaining an offensive game plan, including new powerplay approaches, with his players.
That new game plan will surely include similar plans that both Pittsburgh and Washington attempted against Montreal - throw everything at the net. Shoot, shoot, shoot - from everywhere - bad angles, behind the net, the corner - then crash hard to the net. Hope for a bounce, a rebound. Pray for a goal.
That approach back-fired for Pittsburgh and Washington and will back-fire on Montreal. This year in the playoffs - the formula for beating Montreal is DO NOT PUT MORE THAN 35 SHOTS ON HALAK. More importantly, do not out-shoot Montreal. When being out-shot, Montreal is 8-3. When Montreal out-shoots its opponent, however, they are 0-5.
The crystal ball shows Montreal putting together a great effort tonight, out-playing Philadelphia for stretches, definitely out-shooting and out-chancing the Flyers, but not out-scoring them. As the Canadiens pour on the pressure, the Flyers will generate some opportunities on the counter-attack and be opportunistic enough to prevail 3-1 in Game 3.
The Flyers match up very well with Montreal (or conversely, the Canadiens don't match up well with Philly) and to expect a different result tonight doesn't compute according to the Hockey Guru and his enormous crystal ball.
Bonus prediction: Jeff Carter returns to the Flyers tonight.
What we learned about, today:
Canadiens,
Capitals,
Carnac the Guru,
Flyers,
Hockey,
Hockey Guru,
Jaroslav Halak,
Jeff Carter,
Penguins,
Predictions
Tuesday, May 18, 2010
Hittin Da Lynx: The State of the League Address
By Spezzal Teams Playa
My fellow
Never before in our nation's history have we seen so much activity, from so many sources. All 20 of us are routinely active in a league which requires finesse and attention to detail, if not everyday, then at least every Monday and every Thursday. Our sister league, the STP Baseball Dynasty, enjoys almost complete participation as well, with at least 19 teams playing daily.
But it is here, on this blog, where the fruits of that participation are felt most. Before the month is out, we are expected to pass the 100-story threshold, which is amazing when you consider that this season began with only 50 stories in the archives after the first eleven months of publishing. In fact, I felt that because so many articles have been published here lately, that I should put up a post that detailed those articles, in order to make them easier to locate. The sheer volume of material may have buried some of the features before they could be read by all, so think of this as one of those baseball cards called the Checklist. Got it? Got it. Need it, got it, got it ....
- First off, where would this blog be without the more than a dozen Carnac the Guru installments over the past two weeks. The most amazing edition has to be the one when Boston was leading their series, three games to one. <Carnac Predicts the Impossible>
- On top of those daily features, our friend the Hockey Guru has also provided daily updates to our playoff hockey pool, despite his own obvious lack of a hope in Hell. <Playoff Hockey Pool: May Madness>
- Will-He-M continued where he left off last season, when he started publishing a 30-part series that documented the histories of each MLB teams' top players. To those of you reading this while at work, no need to worry about nudity and swearing. And chances are your boss would engage in the discussion, even if he did catch you fornicating the dog. <All Time Well Wasted>
- Minnesota Chris (aka Hell Lions) would more accurately be described as the person to have picked up where Will-He-M left off, as Will had actually been publishing regular Top Ten Lists last season. If you're not a fan of Drew Barrymore, you can probably still find something interesting here, but for
the rest of us, er,normal people, er, 90% of males, 10% of females, and roughly four-fifths of the gay & lesbian populations, grab some popcorn and prepare to get your Barrymore on. <The Top Ten Links to Click On> - Some of you know him as Fowl Play, but I re-christened him Dive'r Down Dave when he agreed to periodically provide us with his recurring almanac feature. For those of you who fell asleep in history class, you'll enjoy the bullets as much as Eva Braun. <Where Were You, On This Day?>
- I've received a few trade offers lately that were, shall we say, not very flattering towards my intelligence. To those of you who have received a tersely worded rejection from me in the past week or so, allow me to say it more diplomatically. I loves ya but I ain't gonna be no fool. <YouTubey Goodness>
- If you want to call this here post an "article", then maybe I can get away with saying that I contributed multiple stories to the blog the past few weeks. If, on the other hand, you want to be honest, then call a spade a spade and chastise the author for producing only one solitary feature this month, and then whining for days about how hard he worked on it. <Lazy, Whining Pussy>
- Before ever donning the giant turban, and back in the days when the Muff Divers team thought they had a shot at winning the hockey pool, the Hockey Guru used his uncanny abilities to debunk myths, disspell notions and generally do his best to preserve the Queen's English. Despite its earlier vintage, I decided to place it here, in the Andy Rooney segment of this list. You know what I hate? When people don't click on these links. <This Is, The Guru Report>
- And finally, we leave you with something to ponder, whether you're a Bruins fan, or whether you had wanted to see the Bruins get eliminated by the Habs for the 100th time. <More YouTubitude>
What we learned about, today:
All-Time Teams,
Carnac the Guru,
Hittin Da Lynx,
Hockey,
On This Day,
Sports Pools,
The Guru Report,
The Top Ten List
El Gurú Loco: ¿Estos Flip-Flop me Hace Ver "Phat"
By Hockey Guru
The Guru took some lumps on Sunday, as the high scoring shoot-out in San Jose never materialized - but Chicago did prevail 2-1. The prediction that Niemi would out perform Nabokov did materialize though, as the one "soft" goal was definitely a major difference in Game 1. Meanwhile in Philadelphia, it's not certain who looked worse, Montreal or the Guru. Philadelphia dominated in a game that pitted men against boys.
After re-considering the Montreal team and putting them into a new perspective, and after digging up the crystal ball again, here's what the Guru sees in store for the masses tonight:
- Momentum is behind Philadelphia, as their five-game win streak and 6-0 victory demonstrate. While Jaroslav Halak will surely fare better in Game 2, it's impossible for the Guru to shake the images from Game 1 from his head.
- The Montreal defense is a great concern. Although Pittsburgh wasn't able to exploit the defense, for whatever reason, Philadelphia will continue to get opportunities and more importantly, to score goals.
- Montreal's offense has been so reliant on Mike Cammalleri, and his performance through two rounds was legendary, but Cammalleri is not going to be able to keep up the pace.
The Guru is revising his prediction for this series, as it is within the Laws of Carnac to do, and is now selecting Philadelphia in five games. The lone Montreal win will not be tonight. Tonight the Flyers will continue to play with the urgency that's been in their game since being down 0-3 to Boston, and will prevail tonight by a score of 3-1.
Recapping: Series prediction changed from Montreal in 6 games, to Philadelphia in 5 games
Game 2 final score prediction: Flyers 3, Canadiens 1
San Jose is in the familiar position of being down 0-1 in a series and needing a big win in Game 2. Against Colorado, the miraculous comeback included a last minute goal by Little Joe to tie the game and then an overtime goal to even the series.
Chicago is starting to play its best hockey of the year and Marian Hossa is about to make his mark in these playoffs. The prediction of a track meet, or up-and-down action with thrilling scoring chances, may have actually been looking too far into the future. So tonight, the Guru will stick with the high scoring prediction from Game 1, and also stick with the Hawks to prevail. Final score: Blackhawks 5, San Jose 4.
What we learned about, today:
Avalanche,
Blackhawks,
Canadiens,
Carnac the Guru,
Flyers,
Hockey,
Hockey Guru,
Predictions,
Sharks
Sunday, May 16, 2010
Carnac the Guru: ... And Then There Were Four
By Hockey Guru
The abbreviated 2nd Round saw the Guru correctly predict 3 of the 4 series winners, and go 11-7 on the 18 individual game predictions. This was, of course, based simply on picking the winners. The results which were based on total score predicted have not yet been calculated, but it appears that the Guru was approximately, oh, let's say .... 16-1. [Ed. Note: In the words of Scorsese actor, Griffin Dunne, "that's not enough numbers, but okay ...."]
Anyhow, with yesterday's off-day behind him, the Guru has geared up for the Conference Finals, which begin in about 45 minutes. Here now, are the new predictions.
The Sharks must be "relieved" not to relive another post season nightmare. The Blackhawks are where they expected to be right along.
The Guru believes that the Blackhawks will look to push the pace of this series - to make it a track meet. The Sharks will comply with the up tempo game at least in Game 1 - and a very fast paced, action-filled game will take place. The speed of the Hawks and edge in goaltending in game one - will end in a 5-4 Chicago victory.
The series prediction (with limited time to be published - so the elaboration will come out as the series unfolds) is that the Hawks speed and goaltending will prevail in 6 games.
The Philadelphia Flyers - the pre-season selection for the Stanley Cup Finals by the Hockey Guru - have home-ice advantage in the Conference Finals against the Montreal Canadiens. The paths to this unlikely series - even had they appeared in a crystal ball - would never have been published.
But these Flyers have overcome a ton of injuries and adversity and find themselves with a path to the Finals without having to knock off either Washington or Pittsburgh. Although Jeff Carter is done, the defense is healthy, Michael Leighton is back and their depth at forward as beginning to emerge.
Their opponent, le Club de hockey Canadien, eliminated both the expected Eastern Conference favourites - Washington and Pittsburgh. Those results sent the Guru back to his crystal ball to figure out how those results were missed. The error was in the data entered. The Montreal Canadiens are not the team that would be indicated by their record at the end of the regular season. Part of the record was the commitment to Carey Price as the starting goaltender. With Price in net, the Canadiens were 13-20-5. With Jaroslav Halak in between the pipes - the Canadiens were 26-13-5. If Halak's wining percentage carried over to all 82 games - the Canadiens would have finished with 106 points - fourth in the NHL and second in the Conference.
This is not the eight seed that they appeared to be, going into the playoffs.
Additionally, the Canadiens have their 100th anniversary team on the ice. (What's that - are people booing the Guru - saying their 100th anniversary was 2008-2009 - which it was based on calander years - however, with the 2004-05 lockout- there was a missing season). Therefore, this is in fact, the 100th season for the Montreal Canadiens - and their magical ride will not end until the Stanley Cup Finals.
Series prediction: Montreal wins in 6 (but 7 would be more fitting).
Game One Prediction: Montreal 3 - Philadelphia 1
What we learned about, today:
Blackhawks,
Canadiens,
Capitals,
Carnac the Guru,
Flyers,
Hockey,
Hockey Guru,
Penguins,
Predictions,
Sharks
Saturday, May 15, 2010
The Top Ten List: Films About The Fast N' Furious
By Chris Barrymore
I really, really, REALLY wanted to include Charlie’s Angels (2000) on this list. After all, Drew Barrymore easily passes for a member of the pit crew, it has a very important scene that takes place at a race track, and you can’t go wrong with Bill Murray driving your race car around in circles on a track. If this was a Top Eleven List, then it would definitely be included. As it is, it will have to remain only on the Drew Barrymore Top Ten List.
At least for now.
Meanwhile ....
Doing research on the Elvis movies ignited my interest in mid-1960's Ann-Margret. Since she is currently old enough to be my mother, I have to suspend reality a bit here in order to not make this weird. So let's say I could time travel.
If I could time travel, like, as in Back to the Future (1985), then I would go back to the Hollywood sets of the '60s on which Ann-Margret was pouring her young soul out onto the silver screen. The class. The beauty. The voice. Like some sort of angel from Sweden.
It is a reminder of a simpler time. A time that I was never a part of.
And ya know, her appearance on the Flintstones in the early 60's didn't hurt either. It simply introduced a new generation (either through the original broadcast or in my case, reruns) to her AWESOMENESS.
Anyway, on a completely unrelated note, here are the Top Ten racing films of all time, presented once again in chronological order:
Viva Las Vegas (1964) starring Elvis Presley, Ann-Margret - This film is considered to be one of Elvis' best films. And his co-star, who from what I’ve seen in magazines, TV specials and internet video, really had it all going on back in the ‘60s and ‘70s. The chemistry between the two stars was apparently real during the filming. Elvis Presley and Ann-Margret Olsson allegedly began an affair which received considerable attention from gossip columnists and led to a showdown with a worried Priscilla Beaulieu (aka the future Mrs. Presley). CATFIGHT!!!
Speedway (1968) Starring Elvis Presley, Nancy Sinatra, Bill Bixby – Another entry from The King, only this time he gets close to an American-born princess. This film is good enough to make The List on its own merits, but gets an automatic pass for being a film that features this guy.
Cannonball! (1976) Starring David Carradine - The plot of this film became the basis for other films on this list such as it's namesake, for one. In this original version, the illegal cross country race degenerates into a violent demolition derby as contestants use any means at their disposal to try to eliminate the competition. It culminates in a multiple car pileup in New Jersey. Funny. The same thing happened to me the last time I was in Jersey.
The Cannonball Run (1981) Starring Burt Reynolds, Roger Moore, Farrah Fawcett, Jackie Chan, Dean Martin, Sammy Davis Jr., Dom Deluise, Terry Bradshaw, Jamie Farr, Tara Buckman, Adrienne Barbeau - This film boasts an All-Star cast and is a hilarious movie. One of my many favorite scenes goes a little something like this:
Fenderbaum: [Fenderbaum and Blake's Ferrari drives alongside J.J.'s ambulance] Pull over! We want to give you our blessing!
Victor Prinsi: J.J., there are two priests in that car. They want us to pull over.
J.J. McClure: Victor, that's two priests driving a Ferrari. When's the last time you saw two priests drive a Ferrari? What are they doing, taking home the bingo money?
Victor Prinsi: No, they're doing the work of the Lord. In a Ferrari, they can just do it faster.
Six Pack (1982) Starring Kenny Rogers, Diane Lane, Anthony Michael Hall - This film is a story about orphaned children who finally find a father. About a lonely man who finally finds a good woman. About an unsuccessful racer who finally finds success on the comeback trail. And everybody lives unreasonably happily ever after.
Days of Thunder (1990) Tom Cruise, Robert Duvall, Nicole Kidman, Randy Quaid - Before Kubrick exposed their marriage as a sham, before it all went bad, and before people starting referring to celebrity couples by some portmanteau of their two names, there was Tom and Nicole in this film.
Dorf Goes Auto Racing (1990) Starring Tim Conway - In this film, the protagonaist, Dorf, with his usual skill, soon turns the race into a shambles and sets the world of stock car racing on its ear. Are we sure we’re not talking about Jimmie Johnson here? I'm sure if someone had actually ever rented a copy of this straight-to-VHS masterpiece, I'd be able to find a clip of it on YouTube. Alas ....
The Fast and the Furious (2001) Starring Vin Diesel, Jordana Brewster, Michelle Rodriguez - The same can be said of all subsequent sequels, but this film has hot chicks and street racing. Need I say more?
Cars (2006) Starring Owen Wilson, Paul Newman, Bonnie Hunt, Larry The Cable Guy, Cheech Marin, Tony Shaloub, George Carlin - Rarely if ever has a racing film, animated or otherwise, taught us so much about sportsmanship, friendship, honor, and loyalty. This film was rightfully nominated for Best Animated Feature for that year’s Academy Award.
Talladega Nights: The Ballad of Ricky Bobby (2006) Starring Will Ferrell, John C. Reilly, Sacha Baron Cohen - This film is already a racing classic and featured a wide range of true life racers and broadcasters including Dale Earnhardt Jr., Darrell Waltrip, and Jamie McMurray.
What we learned about, today:
Chris Barrymore,
Drew Barrymore,
Elvis Presley,
Paul Newman,
Racing,
Terry Bradshaw,
The Top Ten List,
Vin Diesel,
Will Ferrell
Friday, May 14, 2010
Carnac the Guru: Call This One Friday Night Lite
By Hockey Guru
Another Game 7 - another great night of hockey.
The last Game 7 went into Guru's Bizzaro world - and finished as the polar opposite of the prediciton. Rather than a tight game ending with a couple open net goals for a 5-2 Pittsburgh win, it was a one-sided affair and a 5-2 Montreal win.
The strength of the poles continues and the 7th versus 8th Eastern Conference Finals seems destined.
With all the talk about the history being made, in every post so far on the Bruins-Flyers series, how can the Guru not believe that the window to the Eastern Conference Finals will close on the Bruins tonight, as Briere, Richards and Gagne carry an advantage over the Bruins' top forwards, Savard, Recchi, Lucic and Bergeron? The top four on defense don't match up well either, and the home teams haven't fared too well in these playoffs - let alone in series-deciding games. Especially Game Sevens.
Well, the Guru has been burned before. That's why the Guru is hesitating, as Tuukka Rask will probably have a game for the ages tonight. But the Guru is nothing, if not stubborn, and will predict another Flyers 4 - Bruins 1 outcome.
What we learned about, today:
Bruins,
Canadiens,
Carnac the Guru,
Flyers,
Hockey,
Hockey Guru,
Penguins,
Predictions
Wednesday, May 12, 2010
Carnac the Guru: And What Thrives at the Poles?
By Hockey Guru
Eight long hours until the drop of the puck. Man, this is gonna be awesome. The second round is winding down .... (cue the music) ....
What a great playoff season so far. With 10 of the 15 playoff series in the books already - and at least one other ending tonight - the action is slowing down. The upsets, the injuries, ths subplots, the unpredictability of these playoffs has been simply amazing. But not tonight. Tonight will be great action so let's get into trying to predict the outcomes of these games.
Before moving forward, let's pause and reflect on what has happened so far:
- Western Conference Quarterfinals - the 1, 2, 3 and 5 seed advance.
- Eastern Conference Quarterfinals - the 1, 2, 3, and 5 seed lose.
- Western Conference Finals are set with the 1 and 2 seeds.
- Does that mean the Eastern Conference Finals will be the 7 and 8 seeds? Will there by perfect mirror images from the two conferences?
If this prediction of the polar extremes of the conferences is to come true, it would mean that Montreal closes out Pittsburgh tonight and Philly would have to force a Game 7 in the other Conference Semi-Final. Well, going back and playing with his crystal ball, this is what the Guru foresees:
The end is upon on us. The end of this series and the end of the season for one of these teams. The Canadiens are the better story - the heart, the overcoming of not just long odds, but of all the adversity they've faced. They are the overachieving underdog. The Penguins are the underachieving champions. Last year's Conn Smythe winner, Evgeni Malkin, has had a lesser role in this series than Maxim Lapierre. Or perhaps, his lack of production is a major role in this series.
This is going to be a very difficult game for Pittsburgh to win. It is expected that they will come out and play their best game of the playoffs tonight. With that said, they MUST be disciplined and NOT shoot the puck. Yeah, you heard right. They are stuck in the conundrum of having to score goals without shooting. If they get to 35+ shots on net, it is like playing too aggressively in pinball - the machine will tilt and you'll helplessly watch as your opportunity rolls down the drain.
The Guru loves good stories and loves the underdog, but in his gut he sees Pittsburgh finding a way to pull off a Game 7 victory and thereby potentially extending the career of one Wild Bill Guerin for at least another two weeks. His crystal ball foresees the Penguins throwing away the passive approach though - this will be an up tempo game. While players will be diving to block shots and getting back defensively on both sides, there will be mad speed and crazy shots. As Dan Bylsma recently said, "Game 7 feels like a flip of a coin."
The Guru flipped a coin and here was the result:
Final Score: Pittsburgh 5 - Montreal 2 (with two empty net goals to ice a close game)
While not quite as big as a Game 7, the result could be exactly the same for Philadelphia - GAME OVER, if they lose. Of course, that was true about Games 4 and 5 and they survived through those games. Tonight's prediction won't catch any of the long-time Guru-maniacs off-guard, but just to be certain, let's play with the crystal ball again (any excuse to touch the ball).
Claude Julien proved something to the Guru last spring. The lesson the Guru took away from observing the Bruins flop against Carolina was that Julien couldn't make adjustments. When the Bruins found themselves down, he called the team out in the papers and gave them the day off to figure things out on their own. The inability to make any adjustments in that series cost them. Spewing out cliches such as focus, discipline and getting pucks to the net are great and all, but it appears that the Flyers have made the adjustments necessary to score on Rask and shut down the Bruins. And I'm not the only one who sees this as a problem.
Tuukka Rask gives the Bruins a legitimate shot to win. The Brian Boucher injury may not be as severe or grotesque as it first seemed, but he's still out. With Michael Leighton back in nets, however, the Flyers may have improved their goaltending a bit. Tonight's prediction is that the Flyers continue to make history as only the third ever comeback from a 3-0 series deficit continues to unfold. Final Score - Philadelphia 4 - Boston 1.
What we learned about, today:
Bruins,
Canadiens,
Carnac the Guru,
Flyers,
Hockey,
Hockey Guru,
Hurricanes,
Penguins,
Predictions
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