Saturday, February 26, 2011

Souvenir Game Program: Baseball Dynasty 2011



By Spezzal Teams Playa


Welcome, everybody. Please take your name tag and sign the guest book. The punch table is over there, and the buffet is along the back wall. I hope you all have fun and get to know your neighbours.

I have listed everyone in order of last year's Final Standings. You'll note that while all of the teams remain the same, with the same 30 keepers that finished the year, there are three new General Managers, in Odessa, Perrysburg and Santee.



1. Westfield Big Shots

manager: Hockey Guru

email: cbsbaseball2002@yahoo.com

aliases: Clubhouse Chemistry, Westfield Muff Divers, Cherry Blasts

location: Westfield, Massachusetts

date joined: September 2008


Last Season - Reigning League Champion

2009 Baseball - 10th

2010-2011 Hockey - 3rd
2009-2010 Hockey – 5th
2008-2009 Hockey – 5th

2010 Football - 6th
2009 Football – 9th



2. Minneapolis Maulers

manager: Kid Wrassler

email: uwecwrestling@hotmail.com

aliases: Grappler

location: Minneapolis, Minnesota

date joined: March 2010


Last Season - 2nd



3. Wailuku Fowl Play

manager: Div'er Down Dave

email: fastwillie.parker@yahoo.com

aliases: Manoa Morays, Manoa Menehune

location: Manoa, Hawaii

date joined: March 2009


Last Season - 3rd

2009 Baseball – 6th

2010-2011 Hockey - 2nd
2009-2010 Hockey – 6th

2010 Football – 7th
2009 Football – 10th



4. Ashland Traders

manager: Trader Dick

email: krb1keeper@yahoo.com

aliases: Xcaliber, Cleveland Bronsucks, Great Lakes Loons


location: Ashland, Ohio

date joined: October 2008


Last Season - 4th

2009 Baseball – 2009 League Champion

2010-2011 Basketball - 5th
2009-2010 Basketball - 18th
2008-2009 Basketball - 3rd

2010 Football – 13th
2009 Football - 18th




5. Stittsville Top Pair

manager: Spezzal Teams Playa

email: spezzalteamsplaya@gmail.com

aliases: Nepean Hotspurs, Tito "TD" O'Dell

location: Ottawa, Ontario

date joined: September 2007


Last Season - 5th

2009 Baseball – 11th

2010-2011 Hockey - 11th
2009-2010 Hockey – 10th
2008-2009 Hockey – 4th
2007-2008 Hockey – 9th

2010-2011 Basketball – 4th
2009-2010 Basketball – 10th
2008-2009 Basketball – 2009 League Champion

2010 Football – 3rd
2009 Football – 14th
2008 Football – 10th



6. By-Tor & the Snow Dogs

manager: Chris St. Paul

email: cjk863@yahoo.com

aliases: St. Paul Sidewinders, Minnesota Hell Lions

location: St.Paul, Minnesota

date joined: September 2007


Last Season - 6th

2009 Baseball – 12th

2010-2011 Hockey – 7th
2009-2010 Hockey – 4th
2008-2009 Hockey – 3rd
2007-2008 Hockey – 10th

2010-2011 Basketball – 13th
2009-2010 Basketball – 2nd

2010 Football – 8th
2009 Football – 17th



7. Santee Swashbucklers

manager: Brandon Greenz

email: greenzisgood@yahoo.com

aliases: Vinny Chase's Sluts, Coronado Cougar Chasers, Da Pad Squad

location: San Diego, California

date joined: March 2010


Last Season - 7th



8. Screw Balls

manager: Uncle Jesse

email: hidden@ddress.com

location: Hazard, Kentucky

date joined: March 2010


Last Season - 8th



9. Odessa Isle Wind

manager: Gary “Ace” Ventura

email: aventuraexisle@yahoo.com

aliases: Silver Sluggers, Odessa Ex-Isles, Odessa Snow Jobs


location: Odessa, Florida


date joined: September 2009


Last Season - 9th

2010-2011 Hockey - 6th
2009-2010 Hockey - 3rd

2010 Football - 18th



10. Edgewater Keepers

manager: Dolan

email: pdn418@aol.com

aliases: Finder's Keepers

location: Edgewater, Florida

date joined: March 2010


Last Season - 10th



11. Phoenix Fellatiators

manager: Phoenix

email: sdp70@rocketmail.com

location: Oia, Spain

date joined: March 2010


Last Season - 11th



12. Sunnyvale Shithawks

manager: Will-He-M

email: habs_rock_100@hotmail.com

aliases: London Pigskin Picks, Toronto Euros


location: London, Ontario

date joined: September 2007


Last Season - 12th

2009 Baseball – 8th

2010-2011 Hockey - 12th
2009-2010 Hockey – 8th
2008-2009 Hockey – 8th
2007-2008 Hockey – 6th

2010-2011 Basketball - 10th
2009-2010 Basketball – 6th

2010 Football – 19th
2009 Football – 6th



13. Golden Carp

manager: Mister McG

email: jerroldmcgrath@yahoo.com


location: Banff, Alberta


date joined: October 2009


Last Season - 13th

2010-2011 Basketball – 17th
2009-2010 Basketball – 3rd



14. Perrysburg Polliwog

manager: Big Storm

email: lonnitschke@hotmail.com

aliases: Hammer Time, Perrysburg Pain

location: Perrysburg, Ohio

date joined: March 2009


Last Season - 14th

2009 Baseball – 16th

2010-2011 Hockey – 4th
2009-2010 Hockey – 18th

2010 Football - 12th



15. New Hampshire Newts

manager: MC Corey

email: hidden@ddress.com

location: Manchester, New Hampshire

date joined: March 2010


Last Season - 15th



16. Illinois Illicit

manager: Scott We Go

email: intothesun8@yahoo.com

aliases: St. Louis Birdmen, Halak Net Monsters

location: Collinsville, Illinois

date joined: March 2009


Last Season - 16th

2009 Baseball – 5th

2010-2011 Hockey - 18th
2009-2010 Hockey – 14th

2010-2011 Basketball – 14th
2009-2010 Basketball – 20th

2010 Football – 4th
2009 Football – 2nd



17. Alameda Crappy Bastards

manager: Yatagon Dan

email: yatagon@hotmail.com

aliases: Alameda Rat Bastards, Alameda Evil Baldmen

location: Oakland, California

date joined: August 2008


Last Season - 17th

2010-2011 Hockey – 20th
2009-2010 Hockey – 2nd

2010 Football – 11th
2009 Football – 12th
2008 Football – 2nd



18. Connecticut Galleons

manager: Moonlighter Mark

email: pmoonlighter24@yahoo.com

aliases: Connecticut Defenders, Connecticut Oak Leafs

location: Norwich, Connecticut

date joined: March 2009


Last Season - 18th

2009 Baseball – 9th

2009-2010 Hockey – 7th

2010-2011 Basketball – 11th
2009-2010 Basketball – 12th

2009 Football – 8th



19. Chesapeake Ming Vases

manager: Astropolis Tom

email: astropolisfantasy@yahoo.com

aliases: Chesapeake Abyss, Chesapeake Juggernauts

location: Chesapeake, Virginia

date joined: October 2008


Last Season - 19th

2009 Baseball – 3rd

2010 Football – Reigning League Champion
2009 Football – 4th

2009-2010 Basketball – 14th
2008-2009 Basketball – 2nd



20. Lockport Malt Liquor

manager: Buzz74

email: aaronverklan@yahoo.com

aliases: Colt 45


location: Buffalo, New York


date joined: October 2009


Last Season - 20th

2010-2011 Hockey - 17th

2010-2011 Basketball – 2nd
2009-2010 Basketball – 7th

2010 Football - 5th

Thursday, February 17, 2011

The Top Ten List: Songs Containing an NHL City



By Chris Barrymore


St. Louis Blues, William Handy (1914) - This popular American song has been performed by numerous artists, such as Guy Lombardo, Glenn Miller, and the Boston Pops Orchestra. The Bessie Smith/Louis Armstrong version was inducted into the Grammy Hall of Fame in 1993, while the version by Armstrong and his orchestra was inducted in 2008. And of course, the actual NHL team was named after the song. And I'm not even kidding.




Nashville Rebel, Waylon Jennings (from Nashville Rebel, 1966) - The late singer actually had two songs on this record name dropping Nashville, the other being Nashville Bum. Personally, I think Nashville Rebels would be a better name than Nashville Predators. Maybe the name “Rebels” has too many negative connotations, but how many wildlife predators are actually lurking within the city of Nashville?




Carolina in My Mind, James Taylor (from James Taylor, 1968) - So, Carolina isn’t exactly a city. It’s not even a state without a North or a South attached. But if the NHL can cheat in its attempt to regionalize its marketing campaigns for the southeast, then I can cheat and include it here. And why do the Florida Panthers get to claim the entire Sunshine State when the Tampa Bay Lightning also play within the same state borders. No wonder the Lightning hate the Panthers so much. And then you have the Minnesota Wild and the Colorado Avalanche, who are doubly cheating by not only using their home state instead of a city, but also using a non plural team name. Makes me sick. What’s next, the Winnipeg Windchill? How about the Quebec Electricity?




L.A. Woman, The Doors (from L.A. Woman, 1971) - This is the final record that Jim Morrison recorded before his still mysterious and debated death in a Paris hotel room’s bathtub. Morrison was also called The Lizard King. Lizard King. Los Angeles Kings. Need I say more?




Jesus Just Left Chicago, ZZ Top (from Tres Hombres, 1973) - And if the Blackhawks keep playing like they have been, then Jesus will be carrying the NHL’s Holy Grail, The Stanley Cup, with him on his way out of town. The Hawks currently sit in 11th place, 4 points out of the 8th seed.




Philadelphia Freedom, Elton John (single release, 1975) - Eventually reaching #1 on the music charts in several countries, this song is actually inspired by the Philadelphia Freedoms tennis team. However, numerous hockey references are available if you’re willing to swallow the red pill and see the world in its true light. The Philadelphia Flyers were founded in 1967. The songwriting partnership of Elton John and Bernie Taupin was founded in 1967. Philadelphia Freedom came out in 1975. The Flyers won the Stanley Cup in 1975. Besides all that, PF are the initials of both the song and the team. Mind = blown.




Detroit Rock City, KISS (from Destroyer, 1976) - With one of the best home ice records in the league over the past couple of decades, the Red Wings often rock their opponents. Corny, I know, but true. Besides, I don’t see anyone else trying these lists, so shut up. A connection could also be made by pointing out that KISS is one of music’s top merchandisers, with everything from coffee to condoms to coffins, while the Red Wings are one of the league’s leaders in merchandise sales. Although I doubt we’ll see Red Wings condoms or coffins anytime soon.




New York State of Mind, Billy Joel (from Turnstiles, 1976) - There are a couple of interesting things about this one. The running time is 5 minutes 58 seconds. That is also the over/under on how long it will take for the first player ejection when the New York Islanders and Pittsburgh Penguins meet again on April 8, 2011. And 1976 is also the over/under on penalty minutes for that same game. I can’t wait to see Mario Lemieux in the front row in Uniondale, banging on the glass, cheering on his Penguins.




Buffalo Stance, Neneh Cherry (from Raw Like Sushi, 1988) - Neneh Cherry (no relation to Don Cherry, or Cherry Blasts for that matter) offered this tune on her debut record in the late 80s. She would achieve international success with this record and song, before fading into pop culture history like so many others. Some inside sources have said this was originally titled “Bison Stance” but was changed at the very last minute. Whew - close one!




Our Love is as Tall as the Calgary Tower, Woodpigeon (from Die Stadt Muzikanten, 2010) - No hockey related list would be complete without at least one Canadian inclusion. I know nothing about this band, or if they are any good. But by including an NHL city in one of their song titles, they’re in. Congrats, Woodpigeon.