Feel Like Going to a Movie? How About Moneyball?

By Chris Barrymore


It was a rare night out at the movies, and for once it wasn't a cartoon. No, this time, kid coverage had been arranged and it was a night out with the wife. Our choice, perhaps surprisingly given that my wife is an avid non-baseball fan, was Moneyball.

No spoilers here, be assured. Besides, this is a story that played out in the Major Leagues ten years ago. So even if I did include spoilers they wouldn't really spoil anything. (At least not of the same magnitude as telling someone that Bruce Willis is really dead the whole time in The Sixth Sense, or that Nicole Kidman and her kids are the ghosts in The Others). Anyway, there I go digressing again.

I was a bit nervous about how much (or how little) I would actually be able to get into this film. I am not a great baseball mind. I am not even an average baseball mind. Sure, I follow the Twins a bit and hope they win, and am exposed to a lot of Twins coverage in the local media. In the summer, it is kind of hard to ignore. But I can't say that I am a student of the game.

However, I found that the story of the early 21st century Oakland teams ran slightly parallel to the Twins and their approach, at least up until a few years ago when the Twins starting inflating their payroll.

Brad Pitt is usually good, although I found myself hoping that at some point in the film he would say, "The first rule of Moneyball is that you do not talk about Moneyball". Jonah Hill played a more straightforward character here, but he still generated a few laughs. Felt it was a bit long during certain parts, but had a nice sweet ending. And no, I did not cry. Because there is no crying in baseball. Or in baseball movies.

My Rating: 9 Drews out of 10

---

---

What The Hell Ever Happened To: Manon Rheaume

By Chris Barrymore


Way back in 1992, while Drew Barrymore was still trying to get off drugs and get some decent film roles, there was a 20 year old French Canadian goalie taking the hockey world by storm. Eventually ascending through the ranks, she signed as a free agent with the Tampa Bay Lightning in 1992.

Publicity stunt for a newly born franchise in a non-traditional hockey market, you say? No argument there.

But it wouldn't be the first time some hot young 20-something has been used as a marketing ploy. The Lightning had to find some way for people to realize they existed, and this just might have been it.

Manon played in only two exhibition games for the Bolts, against the Blues and the Bruins, before moving on to some women's international competitions and some IHL teams for 5 years.

Unbeknownst to me, Manon also played for the Minnesota Whitecaps of the WWHL in 2009, helping that team to the Clarkson Cup Finals. Why did the local news not cover this? It is an outrage.

Anyway, these days she dabbles in pop culture outlets from time to time, and is also involved in youth hockey programs for girls via the creatively named Manon Rheaume Foundation.

Oh, and she's still a fox.

---

---

Not a Fucking Sport: Drew Barrymore's New Band

By Chris Barrymore


Long ago, in a galaxy far away, there was a certain member of these leagues (who shall remain nameless) that was dealing with a certain fascination with one Ms. Drew Barrymore. For those of you who remember and have tried to forget, I apologize. For those of you who were never exposed to it, I envy you.

But at one time, in the far reaches of this league manager’s mind, it was conjured up that Drew Barrymore started a rock band. This band was called Drew Barrymore and the Slapshots, if I recall. The band released a collection of songs on various formats (my preference being the special edition double LP vinyl) filled with hockey themed songs of suggestive double entendres and innuendo. Needless to say, the record/CD/8 track/cassette/MP3/digital whatever sold millions and was a huge hit.

Now, being the ambitious, creative, intriguing, and mesmerizing person that she is, Ms. Barrymore decided that just doing that hockey album was not enough. Even though she loves hockey and cannot wait for it to start again and is thinking about doing a countdown to when the hockey drafts might start, she wanted to do a quick side project and put together a new band to do a record about baseball. The name of this band, you ask? Drew Barrymore and the Ball Boys.

Here are the details of this stunning new release:

TRACKLISITING:

Squeeze Play
Foul Territory
Sweet Spot
Bottom of the Ninth
Blowing the Save
Bushleaguer
Getting to First Base
Outside My Strike Zone
No Hitting (On Me Tonight)
One Night Home Stand
Juiced

Of course, given the explicit content, Walmart is refusing to carry this. So you will need to search elsewhere for your must-have copy.

Well, time to go and watch Fever Pitch again.

---

---

The Top Ten List: Songs Containing the Word 'Ice'

By Chris Barrymore


As with any list related to artistic endeavors, objectivity goes out the window and subjectivity quickly assumes command. Therefore, this list will reflect (as it should) my own personal tastes. This means no Ice Cube, Ice T, and despite the warning from Stitts, no Vanilla Ice. Deal with it. Not saying that these artists don’t deserve accolades for their music. Well, except for Vanilla Ice. Nothing against him as a person, but the song? That’s another story. Ice Ice Baby is like mold on the unflushed toilet bowl of American pop culture. No matter how hard you scrub, you can never quite get all of it and somehow it still remains. Moving on.

(Disclaimer: Due to the lack of song titles with 'ice' in them in the musical genres that I am really into, there is a limit to how much this list accurately reflects my true musical preferences. It’s not like Rush (really big fan) even has any lyrics with 'ice' in them, so I can’t even stretch that into a Six Degrees of Kevin Bacon style rambling. I’ve got better things to do. Or do I? Again .... moving on).

---

Skating Away on the Thin Ice of the New Day, Jethro Tull, 1974 – Ever the quirky British band, they’ve now been around for 43 years incorporating a wide range of styles including progressive, folk, blues, classical, and jazz to name a few. The song title could perhaps be applied to an AHL callup hoping for some 4th line duty in that night’s game, but at the same time knowing he may get a tap on the shoulder sending him back to Bridgeport, Rochester, Providence, Grand Rapids or Rockford. Thin ice indeed.

---

Cold as Ice, Foreigner, 1977 – A staple of classic rock radio, this remains an iconic song that has since been covered by other artists and integrated into the Rock Band video games. Thank you, Lou Gramm and Mick Jones.

---

Ice Cream Man, Van Halen, 1978 – Eddie and company offered a cover version of this John Brim song on their world shaking debut record. Not necessarily directed related to hockey, but then again who doesn’t enjoy a nice ice cream when watching a game at any level?

---

The Thin Ice, Pink Floyd, 1979 – Many of these songs about ice understandably convey a feeling of desolation and/or contradiction. Ice, after all, is a cold word. This song from the classic (yet about to crumble) lineup of Pink Floyd is no different.

---

Fire and Ice, Pat Benatar, 1981 – Another classic rock gem, this is 3 min 20 sec of hard hitting rock from a woman who some say pioneered a certain pathway in music that others have continued to follow. “You come on like a (Calgary?) flame, then you turn a cold shoulder, fire and ice”. Chilling.

---

Ice, Sarah McLachlan, 1994 – The sultry siren from Nova Scotia, but now based in Vancouver, released this simply titled, yet haunting track, on her Fumbling Towards Ecstasy masterpiece. Most likely a Canucks fan, if a hockey fan at all.

---

Ice Queen, Within Temptation, 2001 – This Dutch symphonic metal band is fairly popular in Europe. Not so much in North America. And that’s not okay. This particular song has become one of their most popular and is often the show closer.

---

Ice Cold Man, Probot, 2004 – The Foo Fighters' Dave Grohl lined up a series of singers that inspired him as a youth for this project. This track features Lee Dorian of Napalm Death on what some reviewers have called “a doom laden dirge”. I see this track being used if the NHL ever allows entrance music to be used for certain players, similar to the way that MLB closers can have special music played on their way to the mound for the final 3 outs.

---

Black Ice, AC/DC, 2008 – The hard rock band’s first new material in 8 years, this title track closed out the album. Say what you will about the band’s tendency to play the same chord over and over, only with different lyrics, throughout the course of their career. Whether you like them or not, there is no denying their popularity and success. And being in Minnesota, black ice will always have a special place in my heart especially since the overnight low tonight is forecast to be between 10 and 20 degrees below 0 (Fahrenheit).

---

The Hockey Theme, Neil Peart, 2009 - Speaking of Rush, rounding out The Top Ten List is the last minute addition of Neil Peart’s The Hockey Theme, arranged and recorded for TSN. I am qualifying this track on the basis that I’ve seen the subtitle Fire on Ice used for this new version of the old Hockey Night in Canada theme by Canada’s greatest, and some say the world’s greatest rock drummer. It gets no more genuine than this.

---

And since this list is spawned from a fantasy hockey league, allow me to end with my own fantasy section I like to call the “If Juliette Lewis Can Do It” category.

Drew Barrymore starts a rock band called The Slapshots and they come out with a record/tape/CD/MP3/digital whatever filled with songs of hockey related double entendres and innuendo. Sample song titles may include the following: Slip it Through the 5 Hole, 2 Minutes in the Box, Spearing Me With Your Love, Hooking You In, and Concussion of Love. Other, less sleazy song titles may be something such as Bench Clearing Brawl, Slapshot to My Heart, Goalie Fight, and a ballad titled simply, Icing the Puck of Love.

Now, you may think that wholesome Drew Barrymore would not be capable of such musical debauchery. I too felt the same way. Then I saw her potty mouthed performance in the recent film Going the Distance. To say I was disappointed is an understatement. Not in the film itself, but in the fact that I was witness to the fading innocence of an angel (although this thought conveniently dismisses her late teens/early 20s, but we don’t talk about that). That is why she’s got to start this band. She can’t go back to being “girl next door” Drew, now.

---

---

The Guru Report: The Blackhawks Show Some Pride

By Hockey Guru


Why is Drew Barrymore so excited?

She just read this great story on the STP Blog -
(STP - the worldwide leader in sports blogs .... well at least sports blogs co-authored by the Hockey Guru).


The Chicago Gay Hockey Association (the Blackwolves) on a whim sent an invitation to the Chicago Blackhawks requesting the Stanley Cup to be available to march in the Gay Pride Parade in Chicago on Sunday June 27.

With the NHL draft on the 26th - the Stanley Cup will be in Los Angeles - which alone provided the perfect "excuse" to decline the request.

However, the Hawks are making sure the Cup is flown back to Chicago in time to be part of the celebration. Not only will the Cup be present - Brent Sopel volunteered to represent the team and participate in the parade.

Perhaps like the Guru, your reaction was - wow, Brent Sopel has some balls to come out and march in the parade. Well he has balls and he will be marching in the parade - but he's not gay. His story is pretty remarkable - he and his wife adopted 4 children 3 years ago - after those children lost both parents within a 6-month span.

In addition to bringing down barriers and allowing eveyone in the City and community to share in the joy of the Stnaley Cup - Sopel is marching in honor of Brendan Burke, the son of Toronto Maple Leafs GM Brian Burke. Just in case a reminder is necessary - Brendan was killed in a car accident last fall - two months after coming out late last year.

"When Brendan came out, Brian stood by him, and his whole family stood by him, like every family should," said Sopel. "We teach our kids about accepting everybody. Tolerate everybody, to understand where everyone is coming from."

Just a great story and one that the Hockey Guru wanted included in the history of STP Blogs.

Great job by Chicago, Brent Sopel and hockey in general. Once again proving that hockey is the greatest sport in the world.

Drew Barrymore, Sandra Bullock and Taylor Swift all fully support this effort.

---

---

The Top Ten List: Films About The Fast N' Furious

By Chris Barrymore


I really, really, REALLY wanted to include Charlie’s Angels (2000) on this list. After all, Drew Barrymore easily passes for a member of the pit crew, it has a very important scene that takes place at a race track, and you can’t go wrong with Bill Murray driving your race car around in circles on a track. If this was a Top Eleven List, then it would definitely be included. As it is, it will have to remain only on the Drew Barrymore Top Ten List.

At least for now.

Meanwhile ....

Doing research on the Elvis movies ignited my interest in mid-1960's Ann-Margret. Since she is currently old enough to be my mother, I have to suspend reality a bit here in order to not make this weird. So let's say I could time travel.

If I could time travel, like, as in Back to the Future (1985), then I would go back to the Hollywood sets of the '60s on which Ann-Margret was pouring her young soul out onto the silver screen. The class. The beauty. The voice. Like some sort of angel from Sweden.

It is a reminder of a simpler time. A time that I was never a part of.

And ya know, her appearance on the Flintstones in the early 60's didn't hurt either. It simply introduced a new generation (either through the original broadcast or in my case, reruns) to her AWESOMENESS.

Anyway, on a completely unrelated note, here are the Top Ten racing films of all time, presented once again in chronological order:

---

Viva Las Vegas (1964) starring Elvis Presley, Ann-Margret - This film is considered to be one of Elvis' best films. And his co-star, who from what I’ve seen in magazines, TV specials and internet video, really had it all going on back in the ‘60s and ‘70s. The chemistry between the two stars was apparently real during the filming. Elvis Presley and Ann-Margret Olsson allegedly began an affair which received considerable attention from gossip columnists and led to a showdown with a worried Priscilla Beaulieu (aka the future Mrs. Presley). CATFIGHT!!!



Speedway (1968) Starring Elvis Presley, Nancy Sinatra, Bill Bixby – Another entry from The King, only this time he gets close to an American-born princess. This film is good enough to make The List on its own merits, but gets an automatic pass for being a film that features this guy.



Cannonball! (1976) Starring David Carradine - The plot of this film became the basis for other films on this list such as it's namesake, for one. In this original version, the illegal cross country race degenerates into a violent demolition derby as contestants use any means at their disposal to try to eliminate the competition. It culminates in a multiple car pileup in New Jersey. Funny. The same thing happened to me the last time I was in Jersey.



The Cannonball Run (1981) Starring Burt Reynolds, Roger Moore, Farrah Fawcett, Jackie Chan, Dean Martin, Sammy Davis Jr., Dom Deluise, Terry Bradshaw, Jamie Farr, Tara Buckman, Adrienne Barbeau - This film boasts an All-Star cast and is a hilarious movie. One of my many favorite scenes goes a little something like this:

Fenderbaum: [Fenderbaum and Blake's Ferrari drives alongside J.J.'s ambulance] Pull over! We want to give you our blessing!

Victor Prinsi: J.J., there are two priests in that car. They want us to pull over.

J.J. McClure: Victor, that's two priests driving a Ferrari. When's the last time you saw two priests drive a Ferrari? What are they doing, taking home the bingo money?

Victor Prinsi: No, they're doing the work of the Lord. In a Ferrari, they can just do it faster.

Six Pack (1982) Starring Kenny Rogers, Diane Lane, Anthony Michael Hall - This film is a story about orphaned children who finally find a father. About a lonely man who finally finds a good woman. About an unsuccessful racer who finally finds success on the comeback trail. And everybody lives unreasonably happily ever after.




Days of Thunder (1990) Tom Cruise, Robert Duvall, Nicole Kidman, Randy Quaid - Before Kubrick exposed their marriage as a sham, before it all went bad, and before people starting referring to celebrity couples by some portmanteau of their two names, there was Tom and Nicole in this film.




Dorf Goes Auto Racing (1990) Starring Tim Conway - In this film, the protagonaist, Dorf, with his usual skill, soon turns the race into a shambles and sets the world of stock car racing on its ear. Are we sure we’re not talking about Jimmie Johnson here? I'm sure if someone had actually ever rented a copy of this straight-to-VHS masterpiece, I'd be able to find a clip of it on YouTube. Alas ....




The Fast and the Furious (2001) Starring Vin Diesel, Jordana Brewster, Michelle Rodriguez - The same can be said of all subsequent sequels, but this film has hot chicks and street racing. Need I say more?




Cars (2006) Starring Owen Wilson, Paul Newman, Bonnie Hunt, Larry The Cable Guy, Cheech Marin, Tony Shaloub, George Carlin - Rarely if ever has a racing film, animated or otherwise, taught us so much about sportsmanship, friendship, honor, and loyalty. This film was rightfully nominated for Best Animated Feature for that year’s Academy Award.




Talladega Nights: The Ballad of Ricky Bobby (2006) Starring Will Ferrell, John C. Reilly, Sacha Baron Cohen - This film is already a racing classic and featured a wide range of true life racers and broadcasters including Dale Earnhardt Jr., Darrell Waltrip, and Jamie McMurray.

---

---

The Top Ten List: Drew Barrymore Performances

By Chris Barrymore


[Disclaimer: While some of the movies here are just plain bad (Full Throttle), most are okay to good, and in a few cases, very good. Disregarding the quality of the films themselves, all of these contain what I feel are some of Drew Barrymore’s finest moments on screen, for one reason or another.]

I should also mention, for legal purposes, that I am not a Barrymore stalker. I am happily married with 2 young sons, and am not going to leave my wife to pursue Drew Barrymore all around the globe in hopes of a chance meeting that turns into a blissful and glitzy Hollywood lifestyle for both of us (instead of just her). However, if Drew Barrymore showed up on my doorstep and asked me to do that, then all bets are off.

Although I was able to narrow down these selections enough to choose the number one performance (Charlie’s Angels), I could not bring myself to rank the other nine films, so once again I present to you The Top Ten List of Drew Barrymore films and/or movie moments, in chronological order:



Bad Girls (1994) co-starring Madeleine Stowe, Mary Stuart Masterson, Andie MacDowell - Set in Colorado during the Wild West era, the plot follows four former prostitutes on the run following a justifiable homicide and a prison escape, who later encounter difficulties involving bank robbery and Pinkerton detectives. Makes me wish I was born 100 years earlier and living in Colorado.




Scream (1996) co-starring Neve Campbell, Skeet Ulrich, Courteney Cox, Rose McGowan, David Arquette - Drew's part only lasts a few minutes in the opening scene, but a shocking and stunning end. Poor Drew.




The Wedding Singer (1998) co-starring Adam Sandler - Since the last List contained so many Roger Ebert reviews, I thought I'd toss in some Leonard Klady for a little Variety: "Barrymore also covers new ground as a light comic actress, making the most of the opportunity to play a vulnerable and appealing character."




Never Been Kissed (1999) co-starring David Arquette - Hey, whaddya know? Friend of the blog, Roger Ebert, showed up after all and had this to say: "Never Been Kissed is not deep or sophisticated, but it's funny and big-hearted and it wins us over. The credit goes to Barrymore. In this movie and Ever After (and in The Wedding Singer, where I liked her a lot more than the movie), she emerges as a real star. An actor whose personality and charisma are the real subject of the story. Never Been Kissed ends in a scene that, in any other movie, I would have hooted at. Without revealing it, I'll identify it as the five-minute wait. This scene is so contrived and artificial, it could be subtitled Shameless Audience Manipulation. But you know what? Because the wait involved Barrymore, I actually cared. Yes, I did."




Charlie’s Angels (2000) co-starring Cameron Diaz, Lucy Liu, Bill Murray, Crispin Glover, Matt LeBlanc - Good, all around wholesome entertainment. The best Barrymore scene has got to be when the Angels are at the race track and she’s got to distract the driver while Lucy Liu breaks into the trunk. Although a clip with the actual dialogue from the film would probably better illustrate the point, this clip is fine by me:




Charlie’s Angels: Full Throttle (2003) co-starring Cameron Diaz, Lucy Liu, Bernie Mack, Crispin Glover, Matt LeBlanc, Demi Moore – I remember this as a pretty bad movie and missing many of the elements that made the first one so enjoyable. But it still makes The Top Ten List.




50 First Dates (2004) co-starring Adam Sandler - Ebert reminds us that Adam Sandler's career arc is mimicking Bill Murray's, from slapstick clown to leading man: "The movie doesn't have the complexity and depth of Groundhog Day (which I recently saw described as 'the most spiritual film of our time'), but as entertainment it's ingratiating and lovable."




My Date With Drew (2004) co-starring Brian Herzlinger - The guy in this movie has serious issues with his Drew Barrymore obsession. He needs help.




Music and Lyrics (2007) co-starring Hugh Grant - Ebert's partner (now former?), Richard Roeper, said this: "It’s more fun than a Spandau Ballet/Tears for Fears concert circa 1985, and I mean that in a good way."




Whip It (2009) directed by Drew Barrymore co-starring Ellen Page – Drew Barrymore as a tough and rugged Rollergirl? Believe it.



Yes, I know she was in E.T. also, and that it was her first major role and everyone remembers that movie. I was going to include E.T. (1982) in this list, but given the nature of the list and the fact that Drew Barrymore was only 7 at the time, it just seemed too wrong and too creepy to include it with the others. It would have been out of place, and is therefore excluded.

---

---

The Top Ten List: Films About America's Pastime

By Chris Barrymore


As I am admittedly a bit more out of my element with anything other than fantasy hockey, at least from a statistical and/or historical aspect of the sport, I hesitate to comment on the All-Time Teams series or some of the other player-to-player comparisons on this blog. While they do make for interesting reading, I am simply not qualified to strongly agree or disagree.

At the same time, I strive to be an active member of the posting community, and I hereby offer a more pop culture themed Top Ten List.

There are likely some obvious films I have missed, or perhaps some older classics that I haven't gotten around to seeing yet, but off the top of my head, these are the baseball films I remember best, and therefore they make my top 10 list. Hit me up in the Comments section with some of your favs that didn't make my List.

I present them to you in chronological, rather than the traditional numerical order:

----------------------------------

The Bad News Bears (1976) starring Walter Matthau, Tatum O'Neil, Vic Morrow

A slim, pimply-faced teenager named Roger Ebert said this at the time, "Director Michael Ritchie has made a specialty of movies about competition. Downhill Racer, about Olympic ski champions, was his first film, and he also made The Candidate, about a political race, and last year's Smile, about a beauty contest. They're all three very good films - but The Bad News Bears is, in a way, his most harrowing portrait of how we'd sometimes rather win than keep our self-respect. He directs scenes for comedy even in the face of his disturbing material and that makes the movie all the more effective; sometimes we laugh, and sometimes we can't, and the movie's working best when we're silent."




The Natural (1984) starring Robert Redford, Glenn Close, Kim Basinger

This was filmed mostly in Buffalo, where I was living at the time. It was a big deal since Buffalo rarely gets any Hollywood attention.




Brewster's Millions (1985) starring Richard Pryor, John Candy

Not entirely a baseball movie, but Richard Pryor was one of the funniest guys around. Toss in John Candy and you can't go wrong.




Bull Durham (1988) starring Kevin Costner, Susan Sarandon, Tim Robbins

A somewhat younger and slightly less fat Roger Ebert than you're used to seeing today said, "Bull Durham is a treasure of a movie because it knows so much about baseball and so little about love. The movie is a completely unrealistic romantic fantasy, and in the real world the delicate little balancing act of these three people would crash into pieces. But this is a movie, and so we want to believe in love, and we want to believe that once in a while lovers can get a break from fate. That's why the movie's ending is so perfect. Not because it seems just right, but because it seems wildly impossible, and we want to believe it anyway."




Eight Men Out (1988) starring John Cusack, Charlie Sheen, D.B. Sweeney

Ebert's old partner Gene Siskel, who nobody had ahead of Roger in the death pools of the day, had this to say, "Eight Men Out is fascinating if you are a baseball nut ... The portrayal of the recruiting of the ball players and the tight fisted rule of Comiskey is fascinating ... Thumbs up!"




Major League (1989) starring Tom Berenger, Charlie Sheen, Corbin Bernsen

The fine folks over at Variety had this to say, "Major League lacks the subtlety of Bull Durham or the drama of Eight Men Out, but for sheer crowd-pleasing fun it belts one high into the left-field bleachers."




Field of Dreams (1989) starring Kevin Costner, Ray Liota, James Earl Jones

Now that Ebert has gotten a little older, a little wiser, a little greyer and let's just say heftier, has his man-crush on Costner waned at all? Nope: "As Field of Dreams developed ... I found myself being willingly drawn into it. Movies are often so timid these days, so afraid to take flights of the imagination, that there is something grand and brave about a movie where a voice tells a farmer to build a baseball diamond so that Shoeless Joe Jackson can materialize out of the cornfield and hit a few fly balls. This is the kind of movie Frank Capra might have directed, and James Stewart might have starred in - a movie about dreams."




A League of Their Own (1992) starring Tom Hanks, Geena Davis, Madonna, Jon Lovitz, Rosie O'Donnell

Because there really is no crying in baseball. Or fantasy baseball. Right Commish?




The Sandlot (1993) starring James Earl Jones, Denis Leary, a bunch of kids you never heard of

Now looking less and less like a white Cecil Fielder, and more and more like a white dude who just ATE Cecil Fielder, our friend Mr. Ebert had this to say, "If you have ever been lucky enough to see A Christmas Story, you will understand what I mean when I say The Sandlot is a summertime version of the same vision ... Neither movie has any connection with the humdrum reality of the boring real world; both tap directly into a vein of nostalgia and memory that makes reality seem puny by comparison."




Fever Pitch (2005) starring Drew Barrymore and a bunch of less attractive people

This one gets a free pass into the Top Ten because Drew Barrymore is in it. Not much of a Jimmy Fallon fan, but I would watch Barrymore do a mime act in the shoe section of Target if that's what her career leads her to.

---

---